Forget Me Nots & Second Thoughts

“Two more…”

“Two more people to give $5000.”

His gaze sweeps across the audience searching for a raised hand or finger. As he holds the mic up to his mouth, the people in the room shuffle and whisper. You turn to the left and then the right looking for the next donor. “Allahu Akbar!” You quickly look in the direction the speaker is faced, and catch a young man in the back of the room lowering his hand. “Just one more pers…”

“Allahu Akbar!” A woman two tables down nods her head.

That’s 50,0000. Now I need  to get just 10  people to give $1000?

We’re all way too familiar with this scene, you are at a fundraising dinner, the speaker is using every hadeeth and verse of the Quran on the topic to encourage, convince and literally beg you to donate to the cause. You eventually raise your hand when he mentions the category that you had decided on before you left the house.

“Allahu Akbar! May Allah SWT Bless you and your family, Say Ameen!” The crowd echos “Ameen.”

Feels amazing doesn’t it?

But, Is it right?

Why does your mosque/Islamic center/local Islamic organization have to book a hotel ballroom, get a speaker from out of state, feed and entertain you in order for you to give for the sake of Allah?

Giving in the way of Allah is for our safety,  and not giving is the real danger. We have to look out for the poor and support our local institutions, and we should do it without a second thought. Although there will come a time when it will be the first thing on our minds, this fact comes from surat Al-Munafiqoon – the Hypocrites verse 10:

“And spend something (in charity) out of the substance which We have bestowed on you, before Death should come to any of you and he should say, “O my Lord! why didst Thou not give me respite for a little while? I should then have given (largely) in charity, and I should have been one of the doers of good”.

The verse doesn’t say I will pray, nor I will fast, but I will give to charity. As though it will be the dearest thing to us at that time. We will be the ones begging, pleading for more time before our souls are taken, so we can give more charity.

When working with the MSA in university, we would go around to Muslim-owned restaurants requesting donations for Iftar. Which was served on campus daily in Ramadan, save for Fridays. Some offered a tray of rice, some chicken, others salad and at the end of the day something was better than nothing. Some shopkeepers and owners sent us off empty-handed. Why? Because they had already done their bit of charity this Ramadan; “we already donated food to the kids at the college.”

As though there is a cap on giving to charity.

In surat Al-Insaan verses 8 to 10, Allah SWT describes those that give for His sake:

“And they feed, for the love of Allah, the indigent, the orphan, and the captive,- (Saying),’We feed you for the sake of Allah alone: no reward do we desire from you, nor thanks. – We only fear a Day of distressful Wrath from the side of our Lord’.”

The verse above adds a second crucial point. Adopting, sponsoring and taking care of Orphans.

What about those kids without moms or dads? The ones whose parents left them there because they couldn’t afford to take care of them? What about the kids who get all these donated clothes and toys but can’t find a single person do give them the love and attention they really need?

The Prophet PBUH was an orphan. Have we forgotten?

A few years ago, in Cairo, we went to visit an orphanage as a tarbiyah exercise, and to see how they were. Of course they were adorable, and fairly well kept, which I don’t assume the case to be in most orphanages. We had been there for about 20 minutes when this young man came in, and the kids started screaming!

“Ammu Sherif! Ammu Sherif!” They all flocked towards him, almost knocking him over. He greeted them warmly and was smiling ear to ear. He stayed there for at least the other 2 hours we did, probably longer, and played with them, giving each their own time. Subhan Allah! Just taking out the time to visit them, obviously in a consistent manner, and it doesn’t cost him anything really. You cannot begin to understand how happy it made them.

Mashallah! How great is his reward with Allah SWT?

May Allah SWT bless him and everyone that tries to work with the unfortunate among us, and alleviate their suffering.

We worry about giving our own children enough attention. We agonize over being bad parents and try to find ways to be better to our children. We think back over our actions and hope they won’t affect them negatively as adults. What about the orphans? Have we given them a second thought?

The Prophet PBUH said, “Me and the one that takes care of Orphans are like this in Jannah”, and he demonstrated by putting his index and middle finger together.

Enough said, now for the doing part.

Everyone that reads this needs to do one of two things, or both.

1) Pick an Islamic Charity and sign up to give a monthly amount from your income. You won’t regret it. For example Islamic Relief has this option to donate to ‘where its needed the most’ which I think is an easy way of making up your mind on what specifically you want done with your money.

2) Sign up to sponsor an orphan, and pledge a monthly amount that is probably much less than your cable and internet bill.

There is no excuse when we have the means we do, as Muslims, not to be looking out for our Orphans and Poor. When we have to answer for being blessed with wealth and safety and why we haven’t tried to establish the same for others.

In verse 8 from Surat At-Takathur we are reminded of just that.

“Then, shall ye be questioned that Day about the joy (ye indulged in!).”

May Allah SWT bless us all with good deeds that bring us closer to Him.

Ameen.

Keeping it Real

A brother was married with 5 beautiful daughters. He was a British Pakistani, and his wife was brought up ‘back home.’ He was happy and everything was going well for about 11 years. He then realized that he needed to be with someone that understood where he was from a little better. So he got a second wife. He married a woman that was a British revert to Islam. When the woman was getting married to him at the mosque people were shocked to find out that she was becoming a second wife. She was offended that they were butting in to her business, and said that they should have just been happy for her. They were together for a few years and they ended up getting a divorce and he moved ‘back home’ with his first wife and daughters.

When asked (after the fact by a couple of years) what she thought of becoming a second wife, she said, “It’s halal in the deen and…”

I stopped her immediately and said, “I don’t want to hear chapter and verse, I want to know what you felt as a person.”

She said that it was okay at first, but of course she was jealous. She was not really happy, she had gotten sick of him putting his family first. When he went out of the country he would come back and go to her house first. She hated that. Eventually it became too much for her. So they ended it.

———————

A couple was married for 3 years and had no children yet, the husband decided that he wanted to get married because he didn’t want to have kids with his wife. So he proposed.

I asked, ‘Omal gayebha eh? Korsi?’ - Then what does he have her for? As furniture?

So when he told her about it, she said that it was part of the religion and that she didn’t mind. He didn’t end up marrying again, however it took her about a year to realize that it was something that might not be as peachy as she first thought.

———————

Do you see the difference between how the picture looks when we are trying to use religion to sugarcoat our issues and just swallow them whole, and when they end up coming back up?

We aren’t some idealistic people that live by the book all day everyday. The Muslim community has some serious issues. By no means is the goal of this to insist on Muslims making their sins and shortcomings public. However, when people write about Muslims, and my complaint is specifically about Muslim Women, they are portrayed as either one of two extremes. They are either oppressed and blame their religion or practicing parents for their problems, or they are too idealistic and are depicted as flawless.

We want non-Muslims to study Islam, and not Muslims right?

But have we as Muslims made that distinction for ourselves?

There has to be a disconnect between the religion and the people. Why won’t you tell the story like it actually is?

Muslims are people, they are complex, they have society, community, family, relationships and emotions. They aren’t superficial robots that go around beeping and clicking like R2D2.They are trying hard, sometimes they fall, sometimes they have to really fight their nafs to follow the religion, it doesn’t always come naturally, and anyone who thinks it does is severely mislead.

We don’t hear much of the actual struggle, which is exactly what this life is for Muslims. It is a struggle to maintain a balanced life working towards pleasing Allah SWT while living fulfilling lives. This is not something easy to do, when I read/hear people saying they just do these things it upsets me.

When a sister is tested with her husband marrying a second wife, and they are all sitting in the same room eating dinner it isn’t a party. They are not best friends. I have heard it over and over, “me and my co-wife are best friends”. It makes me sick to my stomach. Say “we get along”.  Say “were learning to overcome the changes that have taken place in both of our lives in the recent past”. Save the lies for yourself.

When the man makes all the kids come together and play with each other like nothing is wrong, he is blind. When the older ones saw their mom crying and begging him not to do it. Not to get married, they know about their father and his priorities. The  jealousy that washes over the second wife when the husband speaks proudly of his first set of children, but doesn’t mention hers.

When the first wife had a miscarriage and the husband left two weeks later to go see his other wife for a couple of months. The son that has to listen to his father brag about how his half brother is going to medical school and that he wasn’t the one to make him proud. When a father takes his kids to shop for their half-siblings before his trip to go visit them, and how it makes them feel about him and themselves.

Yes, it is halal, but doing what’s halal isn’t always easy.

That’s the point. Don’t pretend it is.

_{- Don’t waste your time telling me the positive side, resist the temptation to teach me a lesson about the flaws in the one sided view of this post or how there is a peachy side to all of these stories. I am sure there is. That’s exactly why I am writing about the other side, because not enough people do.}

Saving Sajdah

Wednesday August 26^th

8:00 pm

Nothing.

She hasn’t moved all afternoon, I’m used to her kicking throughout the day. Especially when I have something sweet. I started to cry uncontrollably and felt like I couldn’t breathe.

Maybe she’s just sleeping, and Inshallah she’ll wake up later, when I lay down.

11:00 pm

I started crying my eyes out.

I knew.

My husband calmed me down and convinced me to get some sleep, and we would go to the hospital first thing in the morning.

Although it’s not something I was conscious of, my views of having a family were very ‘American’. I wanted to finish school, work for a year or two, and then maybe I would think about it. It took the better part of my first trimester to get over the fact. I thought I had my life planned out. I thought I knew what I wanted.

Thursday August 27^th

11:00 am

“Hassan!”

I immediately got up and followed the midwife into the ward. She asked me what was wrong. I told her that the baby hadn’t kicked for 24 hours. Without taking her eyes off my record she told me to have some cold water. “That always gets them going.”

I waited for 5 minutes and still, nothing. The midwife told me to have a seat, and she would call me. I remembered Mom telling me that when she was having my brother he slept for 24 hours straight and scared her to death. She’s probably just sleeping.

Inshallah nothing bad will come out of this. I’m probably just panicking for no reason. Inshallah there is nothing to worry about.

My name was called, and a senior midwife ushered me into an examination room she began to search for the heartbeat. In the adjacent room I could hear someone hooked up to a monitor and a constant little heartbeat was echoing in the ward. At that point in time, there was no sound more beloved to me than hearing my baby’s heart.

She searched for about 4 minutes. My eyes began to swell with tears as I followed her instructions to breathe in and then out.

She then turned to me and asked how long it’s been since I felt the kicking. When I told her, she asked why I hadn’t come in yesterday. I began to tell her that I figured… She abruptly cut me off, “With a baby we don’t figure, we don’t take chances.”

She asked me to wait there and she left the room. I began to cry again. Now, all I wanted was to know that my baby was alive. I’m supposed to be becoming a mommy. I’ve mentally prepared myself for this. This is the most important job I will ever have.

I was then escorted into the exact room I had just been in 2 weeks ago. In fact, the same technician that handled my 5-month sonogram greeted me. I was sure, but I was hoping with all my heart that I was wrong.

In a matter of seconds and with a few clicks of the scanner she confirmed the thought that had been haunting me for the last day and a half.

“I’m so sorry love.”

I started sniffling and was trying to hold back tears.

I asked, “what happens now?”

We were taken to a small empty room with a window and two chairs. We sat quietly and after I cried some more, I called my Mom and told her the news. She was so distraught, and was in sheer disbelief. I felt her pain; she was helpless, all the way across the Atlantic.  “ You’re a Mom, and no one can take that away from you.”

Her words resonated in my mind. I just sat still, and stared out that window.

Sunday August 30^th

6:20 pm

Sajdah M. Othman was delivered, at 5 ½ months she weighed 1 lb 6 oz. She was small and still. There was a peace about her. I held her for a little under 15 minutes, and she was whisked away by the midwife.

All the Inshallahs, every other sentence. Every other thought. People tend to sprinkle their conversation with religious words, it wasn’t like that. I knew that the story in Surat Al-Kahf was about when the Prophet PBUH didn’t say it, and revelation was withheld for a little while. The verse was sent down as a reminder to say “Inshallah.” So I was adamant on remembering to say it. I hadn’t however, fully internalized what it meant. Not until now.

This was my reminder that Allah SWT has the ultimate control over our affairs. We can try and plan and make decisions to the best of our abilities. But in the end, it is if Allah SWT wills it or not. Inshallah isn’t some magic word, that when said, things have to occur. It means exactly what it says, “if Allah SWT wills it.”

This is what He willed.

I accept that.

I considered calling this post ‘Losing Sajdah,’ but when I thought about it in its proper context, she is one of the only things saved for the hereafter, and most else in this world is to be lost.

Our Collective Spirit

When the people around us are afflicted with unfortunate circumstances, it impacts us profoundly. At times, it knocks the wind out of us.

We cry uncontrollably for the death of someone we’ve never met. We burn with anger for a child that was neglected by their mother.  We mourn over her failure to accept the responsibility and recognize motherhood for the privilege it is. We are overwhelmed with sadness and pity for a wife whose husband walks out on her and their 8 kids. We worry about how she will feed them with no education or command of the local language. We are in awe when a husband waits for the test results of his HIV screening. We are disgusted by his wife’s dishonesty and devastated by her selfishness. We wonder with every ounce of our being what she was thinking. We hurt for all of them  and cannot imagine how and if they can ever heal from this.

As Muslims we wish the best and make dua for them, and ourselves, that things get better. We have hope in the Mercy of Allah SWT and faith that His plan is the best possible way. Regardless of whether or not we can recognize that as the case at the time. However, we are still confused and angry. Because we can’t wrap our head around what we’re feeling, or put our finger on what’s causing it.

Allah SWT tells us in Surat Al-Furqan to, “…put thy trust in Him Who lives and dies not; and celebrate his praise; and enough is He to be acquainted with the faults of His servants;- “ (25:58)

Hold that thought. We will come back to this verse in a bit.

These stories touch us on a very basic level.  They wear down our spirit and instill a primitive fear in us, that everything really isn’t okay. Hearing about these situations make us doubt the strength of our own relationships with those around us. What does the future hold for me? How long is it before, God forbid, I get a call from my siblings telling me that we’ve lost a family member?

Our human nature makes us susceptible to negative feelings that cloud our perception; fear and doubt in particular. The Messenger of Allah PBUH said in a hadith that, ‘faith increases and decreases.’  This is especially the case when things are happening around us and we don’t understand them.

There is no better advice, then that of the Exalted Creator of mankind and all of existence. “And verily thy Lord knoweth all that their hearts do hide. As well as all that they reveal”. (27:74) He knows when there is an uneasy feeling lurking in our chests, and when we put up a front. He sees when our spirit is shaken by the events that surround us.

He knows when fear and insecurity creep up on us.’…Does not Allah know best all that is in the hearts of all creation?’ (29:10) And he reminds us in Surat An-Nas to seek refuge in Him from doubt, and the whispers of the cursed Shaytan, the one “who whispers into the hearts of Mankind.”(114:6)

When we turn to Allah SWT and put our trust in Him, we are protected from the devil’s whispers. “As for My servants, no authority shalt thou have over them:” Enough is thy Lord for a Disposer of affairs. (17:65)

We love our husbands and wives, we want the best for our children and we adore our parents and hope they are proud of us. We miss our grandparents and wish we did more for them. When we hear these stories we can’t help but feel that something like that might happen to us. These evil actions hurt our collective spirit. We wear brave faces, but inside it cuts us down and tears away at our self-esteem.

The best way to handle these situations is to recognize them for exactly what they are.

These are reminders to us of the imperfection of mankind.

Our flawed nature is a testament to the Divinity of Allah SWT. People make mistakes, “If Allah were to punish men for their wrong-doing, He would not leave, on the (earth), a single living creature” (16:61). And they do it a lot. They betray, hurt, disappoint, neglect and break each other.

Now lets go back to Surat Al-Furqan’s verse 58, “…put thy trust in Him Who lives and dies not; and celebrate his praise; and enough is He to be acquainted with the faults of His servants.” The other point was that in this verse Allah SWT mentions his eternal existence. Unlike people, He is always there. We will eventually loose everyone we consider close to us, except Allah SWT. Ultimately making Him the best Companion.

Every negative thing that happens to us can either be a lesson or a bad experience, and in both cases is a test.

We should be patient through these tests, because patience is needed during the affliction, and not after the fact. What distinguishes punishment from lessons is how it affects us. If we are tested with a tough time, and have the opportunity to come out of it having learned something, and as a result change the way we see ourselves and lives as a whole, then it was a lesson. If we are afflicted and are only harmed by it but make no changes to our life then it was just a bad experience.

Whatever the problem, no matter how drastic it is, just remember that we belong to Allah SWT and to Him we return. We should put our trust in Allah SWT because He never fails us.

“And Allah is the best of Protectors and He is the Most Merciful.” – (12:64)

Unprofessionalism in the Muslim Community

It’s the end of the month, but there will be no paycheck for another week.

As though being late wasn’t bad enough, to top it off, you are made to feel as though the money you’ve worked for isn’t your right, and they are doing you a favor by paying you anything at all. This Islamic Organization is simply out of money at the time, and you have to wait until they get some. It coincidentally comes to your attention that some employees in higher positions had their checks issued on time and without any delay.

An Islamic school wanted you to teach 2 subjects and pay you as a quarter-time employee. Apparently if you don’t teach 4 subjects to the entire school then you will not be considered a full-time teacher (that isn’t a sarcastic remark). In addition, you were told that your pay was based on 1/4 of the full-time teacher’s pay. When you find out what that rate is, you know that it is much lower than what an actual 1/4 is. They are trying to take advantage of the fact that you are new there and don’t know anyone, or how much they make. Sadly, you do know another teacher, and you realize their dishonesty. As a result, you quit.

Another school refused to pay you your last paycheck after they were informed that the you wouldn’t be returning next year. They claimed that withholding the pay was their right since you breached your contract. When in fact you had signed no contract in the first place. Now you have to take legal action in order to get your money. Contracts are made on a yearly basis, so the option to leave at the end of the year is simply a choice not to renew a contract. There should be no conditions on getting the pay for work that was already done. That same school was telling you and all of  its employees to report lower income than they were actually getting, in order for the school to be eligible for a tax break.

A Muslim-owned business approaches you and requests a redesign for their website. When you gave them your price, they said it was too high. So you agreed to do it at a lower price, and explained your terms for design work (limiting the number of revisions to the design once you finalize it, requiring 50% pay upfront, and overtime will be charged at an hourly rate). In response you get a horrible attitude, and they requested your references, and more samples of your work and said they might consider hiring you. When they had approached you in the first place and offered you the work, based on a design you did, that they saw, and liked. Other Non-Muslim Businesses you work with have gladly paid you the 50% and agreed to abide by these same terms.

Subhan Allah. All of these are real stories.

You start to wonder if these organizations  had planned to abuse you from the get-go?

But, you haven’t done anything wrong to them, so why would they bother, then you remember Allah SWT’s Words from Surat Al-Hujuraat, “O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin.”

Is it because you are working with Muslim organizations, then your work is “Fe Sabeel Illah” – for the sake of Allah – that people pushing the boundaries shouldn’t bother you?

The short answer is, No. Because if it was, we would all be willing to sacrifice to help get things done, and more importantly to help each other. That executive would give up part of his salary to help you pay your rent on time.

Is it because this is my Muslim brother or sister I should let them fall behind on the payments?

It can’t be, because they are the ones that want you to be there on-time, every time, to work for them. They want flawless work, in a hurry, with an impossible deadline and an insane volume of work to be completed by then. This is a paid position, you were promised a paycheck in exchange for specific tasks and duties, and it is an agreement between you and your employer.

Allah SWT requires us to respect these agreements, as stated in Surat Al-Israa, “…and fulfill (every) engagement, for (every) engagement will be inquired into (on the Day of Reckoning).”

Are all employees doing right by their employers, and inherently the victims?

Of course not. Obviously both cases exist, but, unprofessionalism just breeds more unprofessionalism. The employee that slacks should be fired. The employer that mistreats their worker should loose that employee to a more deserving firm.

Woe to those that deal in fraud, – Those who, when they have to receive by measure from men, exact full measure, – But when they have to give by measure or weight to men, give less than due. – Do they not think that they will be called to account? - On a Mighty Day, A Day when (all) mankind will stand before the Lord of the Worlds?” Al Mutaffifeen (1 – 6)

Allah SWT warns us specifically about this type of behavior in the Holy Quran. Yet it seems as though Muslims are failing (repeatedly) to recognize this as the case, or abide by this obligation.

In Project Management there are three main areas that need to be in balance in order to successfully complete a project.

1. The Budget, or how much money is allocated to completing the project.
2. The Schedule, which breaks the project into smaller tasks and their respective deadlines.
3. The Scope of work, which are the things that need to be completed and delivered by the due date.

Whenever any of these three factors are changed, the entire project will be thrown off.

How is that?

Here’s the situation (Bear with my poor example):

You gave me a 20 and asked me to go to Giant and get some items on a list. The list costs exactly $20 including tax. So I have 45 minutes to go and bring the groceries home. The project here is getting the groceries. If you were to call me on the phone, and tell me you need some meat from the Halal shop as well, that would throw me off. Mainly because of the money, I am now over my budget, also it will increase the time I’ll need, and I won’t be able to deliver on schedule.

You see?

So changing any of the three factors in any project will change the other two. If you push these limits then either the project will fail or it will be completed with poor quality.

Bottom line: When the balance is lost, the project suffers.

I believe that to be the exact case with these Muslim businesses and institutions. They are attempting to ‘milk’ employees for work they aren’t willing (or able) to pay them for. They have expectations which exceed their ability or willingness to fairly compensate for. Employees come in with higher than usual expectations from a Muslim employer and expect über-ethical and fair treatment. Employees’ morale and trust in their employer drops, as a result the quality of their work suffers.

Expectations have to be made clear, and fulfilled by both sides. If we all know Allah SWT is watching us, then we should act like it. Muslim businesses and Islamic Organizations are the pillars of our community, when we build our Ummah on broken principles it can fall apart overnight.

Anyone reading this knows that sadly, this is the situation in general. I am sure there are exceptions to the rule, but I have traveled, searched and am yet to find a case where this doesn’t stand true in some way or another.

We have reached rock bottom when Muslims sincerely warn other Muslims against getting jobs with Muslim companies or Islamic Organizations, because of the suffering. Why should it be that in exchange for being in a so-called Islamic Environment you will face all sorts of head and eventually heartache?

I’m not writing this with the intention to bash other Muslims or talk smack about the Ummah. On the contrary, I want to point this out and have it addressed and remedied, so that it is no longer the case. I make dua’a that Allah SWT guides us all to the best of manners and etiquette, and that we are among those that take heed of good advice and follow the best of it.

Risk & Return

Whenever I considered doing anything major in my life, my Baba (Dad) would tell me that I needed to do a “Cost benefit analysis” first. I understood the gist of what he meant, and often thought a great deal about anything I considered doing; mostly resulting in me over-thinking it. During my study of finance in grad school, I came across the relationship between Risk and Return, and believe it or not, this is what really drove it home for me.

Clench your teeth through the technical part, it’ll stop hurting in a second.

Risk is defined as: A situation involving exposure to danger, and in finance it’s the possibility of financial loss.

Here’s the scenario: You have some money (Principal), you want to invest it in a security, there’s a chance it will grow, and a chance it will shrink. The chance the security will loose money is essentially the risk associated with it. Returns refer to the amount of interest that you can gain on the money you invest, or how much the money will grow.

In an attempt to keep my promise about reducing the pain, I’ll cut this short.

Investors (intelligent ones) are thought to be risk averse, meaning they avoid risk like the plague, as much as they can help it. Well, lo and behold there is a trick to reducing the risk on your investment!

It’s called diversification, which pretty much means what you thought it did: not to put all your eggs in one basket, or to invest the money in lots of different stocks or securities.

How that works, is that if one of the stocks you invested your money in goes bust, then it wont hurt so bad, because not all your money was invested there in the first place.

I think you got the idea now.

Back to my Baba, so he said make sure you analyze cost and benefit, pros and cons, risk and return. See the pattern? As Muslims we should constantly be making this analysis. I was in a situation where my Halaqah (Study circle) leader was sitting with me and telling me a story, when she just stopped. I asked her what was wrong, she said, “I was trying to see if benefit would come from telling you that detail or not.” Subhan Allah, such a small statement, but it had a profound affect on the way I see my actions. Every little action counts and should be treated accordingly. We have to look at our life in an objective manner to see the bigger picture.

May Allah SWT bless her, and anyone who has ever taught me anything.

We have to check our intentions constantly, and make sure that our Principal (our actions) isn’t invested in anything other than pleasing Allah SWT or bettering our hereafter. Investing in anything else would be the worst decision you could ever make right?

Allah SWT discusses this poor calculation in Surat Al-Baqarah verse 16:

“These are they who have bartered Guidance for error: But their transaction is profitless, and they have lost true direction.”

Muslims, like good investors should also be risk averse. We should avoid doing anything that, anger Allah SWT, and will as a consequence land us in the Hell fire (May Allah SWT protect us from it.) By ensuring our deeds are invested in Allah SWT’s pleasure we can’t go wrong. Allah SWT tells us just this in Surat Faatir verse 29:

“Those who recite the Book of Allah, establish regular Prayer, and spend (in Charity) out of what We have provided for them, secretly and openly, hope for a commerce that will never fail.”

We should also diversify our investments through doing as many different good actions as often as humanly possible. The bitter truth is that achieving sincerity in our actions towards Allah SWT is neither easy, nor is it guaranteed. There is no confirmation that Allah SWT accepts our deeds. If we could only be as fortunate as the sons of Adam when Allah SWT revealed that He accepted from one and not from the other as stated in Surat Al-Maidah verse 27:

“Recite to them the truth of the story of the two sons of Adam. Behold! They each presented a sacrifice (to Allah.: It was accepted from one, but not from the other.”

So we have to try our best to do as many sincere acts for Allah SWT, and hope for His Mercy and Pleasure in order to increase our chances to making it to Jannah Inshallah.

Here comes one last analogy from Baba, that like the other, makes a great deal of sense.

Your life is like a flight. It has a starting point, and a destination. You have a flight plan that draws out how to get where you are going, and for any Muslim that final destination should be Jannah inshallah. So, you go about following the plan. You finish high school, start college, go to university, and graduate.

Along the way you go slightly off course, you get so involved with your job that you start to slack off on praying sunnah, fasting Mondays and Wednesdays and praying on time. When that happens, you have to catch it, and immediately make a course correction. This will set you gladly back on your way to where you were supposed to be headed in the first place.

In the instance that you weren’t analyzing your actions, or plans for your immediate future in that light, would all of the little plans to finish college, get a job, get a promotion, etc. put you at the correct final destination?

The point is to highlight the importance of making conscious decisions about what you do with your life, if those decisions are all made based on what’s best for your hereafter, then with the help of Allah S.W.T you can’t go wrong.

When I got married, a dear friend and mentor told me to “make Allah SWT the center of your life, and everything else will fall into place.”

That advice stands true in any situation, for any person.

I will leave you with a verse from the Holy Quran (65:3):

“…And if any one puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is ((Allah)) for him.”

Finance Terms You Should Be Familiar With

a) Proprietorship: An unincorporated business owned by a single individual.

Partnership: An unincorporated business owned by two or more individuals.

Corporation: A legal entity created by state law with multiple owners, all with limited liability.

b) Limited Partnership: A partnership where there are general and limited partners. The former are subjected to unlimited liability and control where as the latter are only liable for the amount of their investment in the business, and have no control. 

Limited Liability Partnership: Also known as an LLC is where all partners are only liable for their investment in the business.

Professional Corporation: An incorporated business that offers limited liability to its multiple owners (shareholders) that invest in the business with minimal risk.

c) Stockholder wealth maximization: To increase the company’s ability to generate cash flow, which in turn leads to payouts to stockholders.

d) Money Market: The markets for short-term (less than one year to maturity) highly liquid debt securities.

Capital Market: The markets for intermediate or long-term (1- 5 years to

maturity) and corporate stocks.

Primary Market: The markets in which corporations raise new capital.

Secondary Market: The markets in which existing outstanding securities are traded among investors.

e) Private market: Markets where transactions occur directly between two parties.

Public Market: Markets where standardized contracts are traded on organized exchanges, such as a common stock or corporate bonds.

Derivatives: Financial instruments or securities that derive their value from another security.

f) Investment Banker: A facilitator to help transfer capital from savers to businesses by buying stocks or bonds from corporations and selling them to savers in the form of securities.

Financial Service Corporation: Conglomerates that include several financial institutions under one corporation.

Financial Intermediary: A bank or a mutual fund that takes cash from savers in exchange for its own securities and reinvests the cash in businesses securities.

g) Mutual Fund: Corporations that accept money from savers and use the money to invest in different securities, and pooling funds helps reduce risk to investors.

Money market Fund: Interest bearing checking accounts.

h) Physical Location Exchanges: Types of secondary markets where traders physically meet and trade in a specific location. Examples include NYSE and AMEX.

Computer/ Telephone Network: Types of secondary markets where traders make exchanges over computer or telephone networks and do not meet in person. An example of a computer or telephone networks is Nasdaq.

i) Open Outcry Auctions: An auction where traders meet in person and communicate via shouts and signals to trade.

Dealer Market: A market where dealers keep inventory of traded stocks and list the prices that they are willing to buy and sell at on a computerized quotation system.

Electronic Communications Network: An electronic system that matches market orders to buy and sell at the lowest prices. It then executes the transaction and notifies the parties involved.

j) Production Opportunities: The ability to turn capital into benefits. An example is when a student borrows to pay for college; they expect to get a better job and higher income from their investment.

Time Preference for Consumption: The choice of a buyer or business to save or spend their money in the present or to invest it and enjoy greater spending in the future.

k) Foreign Trade Deficit: When the government imports more than it exports or buys more than it sells on the international market, this debt is paid by borrowing, resulting in a deficit.

How to Wash Your Cat – Humor

Some people have the misconception that cats never have to be bathed. That somehow they “lick” themselves clean. Well contrary to this popular belief, cats do NOT have some enzyme in their saliva that resembles Tide (with or without bleach). Cats, like their nemesis, the dog …. do get dirty and have a variety of odors… from smelling like the outhouse where you camped last year to the same odor as your dog’s breath. (Remember… your dog will try to eat anything.)

Now we all know that cats HATE water. And we know that giving the cat a sedative to ease this process of a bath is out of the question. So, the best approach is both sneaky and direct. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits. Although your cat has the advantage of smarts, quickness and total lack of concern for you …. you have the advantage of size, strength, and the ability to wear protective garments.

1. First …. dress for the occasion. A 4-ply rubber wet suit is suggested, along with a helmet, face mask and welders gloves.

2. A Bathtub with a glass enclosure is preferred to the one with a shower curtain. A frenzied cat can shred one of these in about 3.5 seconds.

3. Have the Kitty Bubbles and towel in the enclosed bathtub area before hand. No … blow drying the cat after the bath is not suggested.

4. Draw the water, making it a little warmer than needed as you still need to find the cat. Position everything strategically in the shower, so you can reach it even if you are face down or prone in the tub.

5. Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick the cat up, nonchalantly as if you were simply carrying him/her to the supper dish. No need to worry about the cat noticing your strange attire… the cat barely notices you anyway.

6. Once you and the cat are inside the bathroom …. speed is essential. In one single liquid motion .shut the door to the bathroom, step into the shower, close the sliding doors, and drop the cat into the water. While the cat is still in a state of shock, locate the Kitty Bubbles and squirt whatever part of him is above the water line. You have just begun the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Remember that cats have no handles and add the fact that he now has soapy fur. His state of shock has worn off and he’s madder than a wet hornet.

7. As best, you can, wearing welder’s gloves, try to field his body as he catapults through the air toward the ceiling. If possible, give another squirt of Kitty Bubbles with his body now fully exposed.

8. During the 5 seconds you are able to hold onto him, rub vigorously. No need to worry about rinsing. As he slide down the glass enclosure into the tub, he will fall back into the water, rinsing himself in the process.

9. Only attempt the lather and rinse process about 3 times. The cat will realize the lack of traction on the glass by then and will use the next attempt on the first available part of you.

10. Next, the cat must be dried. No…this is NOT the easiest part. By this stage, you are worn out and the cat has just become semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. We suggest here that you drain the tub and in full view of your cat . reach for the bottle of Kitty Bubbles.

11. If you have done step 10 correctly, the cat will be off your leg and hanging precariously from your helmet. Although this view of the cat is most disgusting, he will be in a much better position for wrapping the towel around him.

12. Be sure cat is firmly wrapped in towel before opening tub enclosure. Open bathroom door …. put towel wrapped cat on floor and step back quickly. Into tub, if possible, and do not open enclosure until all you can see is the shredded towel.

13. In about 2 hours …. it will be safe to exit the bathroom. Your cat will be sitting out there somewhere looking like a small hedgehog while plotting revenge.

http://www.geocities.com/heartland/hills/6354/lol-catwash.html

Mother’s Advice to her Daughter

This is a translation from Arabic, of a vintage poem or story about a mother giving advice to her daughter that got married and was leaving to live with her husband. Although people may see this as backwards and that a woman is being told to put herself in a position lower than her man, the truth is that when these basics are fulfilled there is more of a chance both parties will be content.

O my daughter, if it were deemed unnecessary to give you this advice because of good manners and noble descent, then it would have been unnecessary for you, because you posses these qualities, but it will serve as a reminder to those who are forgetful, and will help those who are wise.
O my daughter, if a woman were able to do without a husband by virtue of her father’s wealth and her need for her father, then you of all people would be most able to do without a husband, but women were created for men just as men were created for them.

O my daughter, you are about to leave the home in which you grew up, where you first learned to walk, to go to a place you do not know, to a companion to whom you are unfamiliar. By marrying you, he has become a master over you, so be like a servant to him, and he will become like a servant to you.

Take from me ten qualities, which will be a provision and a reminder for you:

The first and second of them are: be content in his company, and listen to and obey him, for contentment brings peace of mind, and listening to and obeying one’s husband pleases Allah.

The third and fourth of them are: make sure that you smell good and look good; he should not see anything ugly in you, and he should not smell anything but a pleasant smell from you. Kohl is the best kind of beautification to be found, and water is better than the rarest perfume.

The fifth and sixth of them are: prepare his food on time, and keep quiet when he is asleep, for raging hunger is like a burning flame, and disturbing his sleep will make him angry.

The seventh and eight of them are: take care of his servants (or employees) and children, and take care of his wealth, for taking care of his wealth shows that you appreciate him, and taking care of his children and servants shows good management.

The ninth and tenth of them are: never disclose any of his secrets, and never disobey any of his orders, for if you disclose any of his secrets you will never feel safe from his possible betrayal, and if you disobey him, his heart will be filled with hatred towards you.

Be careful, O my daughter, of showing joy in front of him when he is upset, and do not show sorrow in front of him when he is happy, because the former shows a lack of judgment whilst the latter will make him unhappy.

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